eroticize your life already, god damn

Sex After Patriarchy Issue: #3

But the erotic offers a well of replenishing

and provocative force to the woman who does

not fear its revelation, nor succumb to the

belief that sensation is enough.

- Audre Lorde, 1978

Nothing feels fergalicious anymore and by god, we can’t let the beigification of the world take over. We simply can’t. I don’t want to wear knee long skirts in pastel tones. I don’t want to enjoy my sexy cappuccino in a café that doubles down as a dentist office, and I sure as hell don’t want to see another reformer pilates studio opening up in my city. Water with protein - take that shit off the shelves. I don’t want to paint my nails in neutral tones. I don’t want to ‘grab a matcha’. You know what, I don’t want to drink water at all. No, you can’t bring your boyfriend.

The easiest way to be governed as a woman is by being frail and agreeable, working 5-9 to erase our flaws on a journey to becoming the hottest version of ourselves. Lookmaxxing until we burn out from this chosen version of our 5-9 faster than we do from our 9-5. Go ahead and burn me at the stake already.

Here’s my hot take: we optimize appearance, because we’ve lost erotics. When we lose access to that aliveness, we work over-hours trying to manufacture some distorted version of desirability instead.

In a patriarchal society, anything associated with erotic becomes a forbidden fruit women are only allowed to nibble on in servitude of men. It’s an energy exclusively allowed to be exuded behind closed doors, where it doesn’t risk luring in unwanted guests. The tragedy is we’ve collectively agreed to experience one of the most vital forces within us only in fragments - and even then, in private. Most of us were never taught to associate the erotic with anything beyond sex. Luckily, you have me, taking you by the hand and yelling at you to better start creating a life that turns you on!